In the End there Lies Despair
by elojello10
Summary: That was when he had to remind himself once again that he was in fact a free man. (Athena and Simon try to patch up their friendship. One shot.)


_Close. Open. Close. Open._

That's all his eyes ever did. He could not find sleep, for years without much sleep proved hard to fall into such a state. He lay uncomfortably on his mattress just staring up at the ceiling, or at least what he could make of it. His tired eyes searched the darkness, the silence both comforting and haunting. With a great sigh, he forced himself into a sitting position, and he had to remind himself that he was in fact not in a jail cell. Through the darkness he could make out the faint outline of a wooden door, not metal bars. The palms of his hands pressed down on the softness of the mattress beneath him; it was not a hard, cold floor or a spring bed connected to a cement wall. He turned his head in the direction of a small window next to his bed where a faint and pale light illuminating from the moon barely filed through his blinds. That, too, was not adorned with accursed metal bars.

He drew in a deep breath and released it through his nose. It took some effort to stand on his two legs, it almost feeling foreign to the man. Of course it wasn't like he had never used his own two legs before, it just felt odd walking on them knowing what he knew. Glancing briefly at his wrists, he noticed something amiss. Blinking, he tried to wrack his brains for the answer.

That was when he had to remind himself once again that he was in fact a free man.

Glowering, he took both hands that were obviously free of the snug metal shackles and smoothed back his hair. For a moment, he held them there like that, allowing no hair to fall over his face. Then, all too suddenly, he let his arms drop and his outgrown hair once again fell over his eyes and around his shoulders. He had once considered cutting it, the length well past his shoulder blades, but never went back to that thought. He grew attached to it, believed that it showed his hardship and revealed his samurai lifestyle in some way. The single patch of white showed a sort of weakness, a softness that he hid away not so efficiently.

What was that weakness?

He clicked his tongue against the back of his teeth, the sound surprisingly loud through the silence.

Yes, of course. He knew what that weakness was, or rather _who_ it was.

Finally, he took to it to take steps toward his door, his movement slow and cautious. It was not hard to see in the dark, his eyes adjusting quickly because of years been holed up in a small, dark jail cell, but he still took careful precautions just in case he would accidentally stumble over something that lay on the ground in front of him. Not that he would ever do something as foolish as that.

Finally in reach of the doorknob, he pulled it open slowly, as if expecting something on the other side. Nothing appeared there. Just darkness. Standing still just for a little bit, he steered out of his room in one quick movement and made his way into his living room. He could hardly make out the barely furnished room, except for a pair of shining beady eyes that watched him curiously in the night. Instantly, he recognized them.

He held out an arm and whistled a low tune. There on his arm now was his trusted partner, his only partner. It stung to even say that, nonetheless think it as well. He shivered. He didn't want to think about that. Never ever did he want to think about it again. As if to find comfort, he began to pet his most trusted friend. It was nice to have something here with him. He was never allowed pets in jail, which was beyond preposterous.

"Taka," he whispered, the beady eyes bright at the sound of his voice speaking his name. "Would you like something to eat?"

The hawk bounced his head of which was presumably meant to be a nod. He out stretched his wings, flapping lightly, and cooed. The man smiled at this, scanning the room with his dark eyes in search of Taka's food. He considered turning the light on to make everything easier, but the darkness was a familiar security blanket to him and he opted not to go with that idea.

Upon successfully finding and feeding Taka his food, the ex-jailer exhaled a breath he had been keeping in for what seemed like forever. Watching his trusted hawk made him calm, and it took his mind off things that were unwelcome for his brain to recall. He continued to watch the beautiful bird, Taka every once in a while looking up from the birdseed in his to stare back into his master's dark eyes. The man found that he was only able to find true comfort in this animal; in something that cannot speak fluently back at him, that does not judge him, and looks after him when needed.

Taka was the only one that could do that for him.

...Or was he?

He frowned to himself. There indeed was another. He didn't want to admit to such an idea, of course. He was stubborn in that way. But there was, without a doubt, a human being capable of making this man feel at ease. But who exactly was this said person? A sigh escaped his lips.

"How annoying," whispered Taka's owner.

The bird twisted its head around in curiosity, watching his owner with feigning interest. Beady eyes blinked and caught black ones, staring back. Flapping his wings, Taka moved from the man's arm and up to his shoulder. Nudging him softly with that of its beak, Taka cooed smoothly, head bobbing and wings twitching. His owner stiffened and then relaxed a second later, sighing in annoyance.

He knew what his partner was getting at. He knew Taka could read him like a book.

"Do not look at me with such an expression, Taka," growled the owner, glumly glaring at the bird. "I know what you are thinking. You are pressing me, aren't you? Just as that spiky-haired defense attorney does in the courtroom- You have been attending far too many trials, Taka."

When the hawk only nudged him and squawked at him once more, he rolled his eyes. What was he even doing, speaking to an animal that had no way of creating a rebuttal to his argument? In this moment, he realized how much he craved human interaction, which he was stripped of half of the time while he was in prison. Sure, he spoke to a few inmates here and there, which left him with stories to tell and conversations to quote, but he never cared for them enough to enjoy the luxuries of conversing. And in this moment, he wanted nothing but to be basked in the comforts of speaking with another human being.

He did have one said being that was persistent and annoying to boot, but they were gone now. That familiar sting plagued his chest, and he had to hunch over a bit to endure it. Taka, confused at the sudden movement, squawked in surprise and clung tightly to his owner's shoulder, his talons digging into the shoulder they rested on. Wonderful, more pain. A grunt and a yell a second later, Taka was soaring to the back of a chair, resting and looking at his owner with curious innocence.

It annoyed the man. Standing up straight, he breathed in and out deeply, ridding of the painful memory. He needed to stop doing that to himself. Though it was rather hard, for the events happened recently enough to still be fresh in his mind. In that moment, he decided he really did need someone to speak with.

Swiftly retrieving his cellular device, his fingers brush past a few contacts. Once landing on the designated contact, he pressed call and walked over to the couch that Taka sat on, still watching him.

The phone rang a few times until someone finally answered.

On the other line, a female voice spoke, "Yo! Athena Cykes speaking!"

Her loud voice made him cringe. "Athena," he spoke, his voice deep and low. "You are rather cheery for how late in the night it is."

There was a pause. "Simon? Oh! Oops, yeah. I'm the only one in the office right now. Boss had some paperwork for me to fill out and I haven't finished it yet."

Blackquill grimaced slightly at the first-name calling. They had started to call each other by their first names a little after he was found innocent for the trial a little while back. It was just like when they were younger and everything was so peaceful-

"Simon? Hello?" Athena's voice once again filled his ear. "You still there?"

"_Ahem_," coughed Blackquill. "Yes. Forgive me. I didn't mean to call you so late. If you are busy, then I suppose I could let you return to your paperwork duty-"

"No, no! It's totally fine! I wasn't really doing anything anyway."

_As I expected of the girl. How predictable..._ "I am sure paperwork constitutes as something, Athena. From what I've heard, it's rather important to a lawyer. Just as important as a katana is to a samurai."

He heard her laugh. "Oh, come on! All this writing and stuff is boring. Besides, I'm sure you didn't call me to tell me the importance of completing paperwork."

Blackquill felt himself growing quiet, glancing at Taka. His bird was watching him with what looked like amusement. He narrowed his eyes at the hawk, grimacing.

"So... what is the reason you called me, Simon?" She added.

He was silent a moment. "...I just wanted to speak with someone."

Athena was at a loss for words. "And, um... you called _me_?"

The tone of her voice made Blackquill immediately regret his decision. All he wanted to do now was to hang up and crawl back into the confinements of his bedroom. He could try to fight his consciousness and go to sleep once more, not that it would really work, but anything but humiliating himself over the phone would do. He let out a sigh without even realizing it.

"You know," he heard her speak suddenly, throwing himself out of his thoughts, "I'm glad."

He blinked, staring at the blank screen of his television. He was bewildered, confused by her choice of words. He didn't know exactly how to reply, but he needed to in order to avoid offending the young female defense attorney. But what to say?

Quickly, he replied, "Glad? Whatever for?"

Athena giggled. "I'm glad you decided to call me. It makes me happy, you know? I enjoy talking to you, and the fact that you called me instead of someone else makes me feel special!"

"Special," Blackquill repeated, an amused tone in his voice and a smirk on his lips. "Conceited, are we? Who says I did not try to call someone else before you, Ms. Cykes?"

"Hey! That's not nice! And I'm pretty sure you don't have anyone else to call other than Aura, and you and I both know she isn't exactly the person to talk to if you just want to 'talk'."

Widget spoke up then, "_She's the worst!_"

Blackquill found himself smiling slightly. This was just what he needed. "I suppose you're correct, Athena."

He could almost see the girl smiling through the phone. But when she didn't reply, he grew worried. Why was she so silent for so long? He began to chew on his bottom lip, of which he didn't do often. Finally, he heard a sigh on the other side. It made the man more confused.

"I have a feeling you want to do more than just talk," spoke the girl, yawning into the phone. "Am I right?"

"...Correct," replied Blackquill, unsure why he so easily agreed with her.

"Right. In that case, I'm heading over," she announced suddenly. "It's too late to protest, as I'm already half-way there."

The prosecutor blinked. She was on her way here? But that couldn't-

Oh no. No, no, no. Seeing her would sure trigger emotions he kept locked away in his heart. He didn't want that, nor did he want her to see him in that state.

Blackquill protested, "Turn around, Athena. Do not come. If you do, I will be forced to draw my katana on you."

"You wouldn't do that!" laughed Athena. "Besides, last time I checked, you used that sword to protect me, not hurt me."

The man was now completely silent. He didn't know what to say to that. In all honesty, what she claimed was entirely true. He used the same katana he currently owns to protect Athena from being accused of a murder she did not commit some several years ago. Unfortunately, it only put the blame on himself and he was thrown into jail in her stead. Thinking back now, he realized how foolish the act was. But the more he thought on it, the more he came to realize why he wanted to protect Athena so urgently. Those two had a bond, and she was only a little girl when the crime was committed. He wouldn't allow for such a small girl to go to prison to be sentenced to death for something she was not responsible for. But even after everything, Blackquill still felt guilty. He indefinitely believed that Athena was the one -at the time- that had killed her own mother. Though he wanted to believe otherwise, the story was full proof until a man by the name of Phoenix Wright unraveled the truth behind it.

Another pain in his chest caused him to cringed and gasp, and he nearly dropped the phone that was at his ear and forgot it was there until he caught it once more and replaced it at the other ear.

As soon as he did so, he heard Athena speak just in time, "Open the door, Simon."

His head whipped around to gaze at the door, his grip tightening around the phone in his hand. He watched the door through the darkness, waiting for something, anything, to move. It was too dark to see.

"And what if I refuse to do so?" asked Blackquill quietly.

"You won't," replied Athena.

He could hear her on the other side of the door now as her voice echoed into his phone. He stood up slowly and cautiously made his way toward the door. Once he unlocked it, he didn't think to hang up on the phone. So when he opened the door, the both of them just stood there with their phones still to their ears, as if they thought when the door opened, neither of them would be there, just their voices present to comfort each other.

Athena smiled at Simon, speaking into the phone and looking at him fondly with bright eyes, "Hello."

Simon let the arm with the phone in it drop. He narrowed his eyes. "I warned you not to show up."

The female shrugged playfully and hung up, putting her phone away. "Since when did I ever listen?"

"You really should start listening," he informed her, moving so that she may come in. "It is good manners."

"Yeah, yeah," she waved him off, making her way inside. Though, she stopped short once she entered. Looking around, she furrowed her brow. It was so dark in his apartment. How did he even see in here? Her eyes landed on a familiar hawk that was watching her intently. She smiled and turned toward Blackquill as he was shutting and locking his door.

"I hope you don't intend on staying for long, Athena," he told her, meeting her eyes.

She pouted, "But it's the middle of the night! You expect me to go out? A girl like me isn't allowed to be out at such hours!"

Blackquill cocked an eyebrow. "Then how did you get here by yourself _at such hours_?"

Athena froze at her contradiction being revealed. She stiffened, frowning now that she was caught. "Oh shut up! But seriously, you should let me crash here. Just for one night, I swear!"

"Fine," sighed Blackquill, rolling his eyes.

Athena smiled brightly and subconsciously hugged her "savior". At this gesture, Blackquill gasped and jolted, pushing Athena away. Blinking, Athena stared at him. Thinking she did something wrong, she wore a worried expression.

"Sorry," she apologized, rubbing her arm.

Quick to react, Blackquill refuted, "Think nothing of it."

They stood in silence for a great while until Taka squawked at them, causing them both to jump in surprise.

Blackquill sighed softly, rubbing the back of his neck with a sweaty palm. "The guest bedroom is to the right in the hall. You may sleep there."

Athena nodded, her blue eyes bright in the darkness. "Oh. Yeah. Thanks."

Blackquill nodded back. He watched her as she turned toward Taka once more and stepped toward him, holding out her arm for him to rest on. The man didn't think Taka would do it, but he wouldn't be surprised in the slightest if the bird did. Taka had a mind of his own. And once he saw that the hawk submitted to the young defense attorney, Blackquill was overcome with a sudden chuckle, which caught the attention of the two in front of him. Immediately, he coughed into his fist and pretended he was paying attention elsewhere.

Athena raised an eyebrow and gazed at her friend. Exchanging glances with Taka, the woman shrugged and smiled. She protruded a hand toward Taka and pet him.

"He's gotten big, hasn't he?" cooed Athena, smiling at the positive reaction she was getting from the hawk. "He was only a baby the first time I saw him."

"His spirit has grown stronger living in the courthouse. A samurai always has a fierce beast with him when his sword can no longer strike," replied Blackquill, his response a little off subject.

Athena burst into laughter, Simon's eyes narrowing into slits. "Oh my God. Do you ever listen to yourself speak sometimes, Simon?"

"That's a ridiculous question. My words are the only things I need to listen to."

"Oh, boy. _Exactly._"

He rolled his eyes. "You should retreat to the guest bedroom, Athena."

"Mmm," she replied softly, staring at Taka upon her arm. "Yeah, I guess you're right. I am feeling beat. That paperwork was exhausting."

"From my understanding, you claimed you weren't exercising the action of completing it."

"Shush! You always ruin the mood!" She scolded, carefully letting Taka down from her arm and back onto the back of the couch. She glanced at Blackquill and stuck her tongue out.

He stiffened at the childish gesture and averted his gaze away. Athena frowned. _What's his problem? He's so hard to read nowadays._

"Hey," Athena spoke, making her way closer to Blackquill. "Why is your apartment so dark? How am I supposed to get to the room if I can't see? Sheesh, Simon. Have you ever heard of something called lights?"

He stepped away a little but was caught by her hand at the end of his sleeve. He hesitated, "I need not something I never had when I was in prison..."

Athena's eyes widened in sudden realization at his last word. _Prison..._ "You're still upset... Simon, everything is different now. Is that why you can't sleep? Is that why you called me? The real reason was because... you needed someone here for you... right?"

"_I'm here," _spoke Widget suddenly.

Blackquill met her eyes with his, and the look she gave him made his insides turn in on themselves. Everything she said was true, but he still couldn't openly voice that. He looked past her and at Taka, avoiding her gaze now. He had nothing but his cold side to show.

"I think you should go to sleep," he replied, his voice low.

That wasn't the response Athena was looking for. She glared daggers into his face, or at least that was what if felt like to the dark samurai. This was nothing but awkward. He moved past her, her fingers still gripping his sleeve, and led her to her bedroom. Once at the door, he gently opened it.

Blackquill turned toward her then and bowed his head respectively.

"Here is your sleeping quarters," he informed her, still not meeting her gaze.

Athena sighed. "Thanks, I suppose."

Simon nodded in understanding. He was about to step around her and head toward his own bedroom until he felt a tug at the front of his shirt that made him freeze in his tracks. Forced to look at the woman that was demanding his attention, he noticed her distressed expression.

"Simon," she breathed, causing the man's eyes to widen, "you don't have to hide anymore. You can tell me anything. You know that right?"

He stood in silence for a moment. "...Of course." His response was halfheartedly spoken.

"_Please don't keep me in the dark._"

Blackquill blinked at the sound of Widget speaking instead of Athena. It sounded... desperate; like something Athena would never say. Well, the machine did often voice the thoughts that bottled up inside the girl's head. It made the man feel guilty. He knew her showing up was a bad idea. He closed his eyes and exhaled slowly.

"Athena, I –"

Athena silenced him as she stood up on her tip-toes and gently pecked him on the cheek. It was a friendly gesture, one that showed she was there for him and that she loved him. She often did this to him when she was younger, and it caught him by surprise. A noticeable blush lit up his features as well as Athena's as she returned to her place where she stood.

"I'll still be here in the morning," she whispered to him. "I'll always be here for you. Goodnight, Simon."

With that, she walked into the guest room and gently shut the door behind her. Simon was stunned into silence, standing there dumbfounded. He couldn't place a finger on what just occurred, and he was subconsciously making his way toward his bedroom. Flopping down on his bed, he stared up at the blank ceiling above him for a long while.

That's when he finally realized what he should have realized years ago.

All he ever wanted, needed...

It was always right there.

_She_ was always right there.

And soon enough tears overtook his eyesight and a smile replaced the thin, hard line of his mouth. And the exhaustion of not sleeping for days settled in as he found himself drifting asleep, content with his new found discovery.


End file.
